solid ground

the last couple weeks have been okay. i helped another project manager build a playground in ogden, utah, and we had a lot of fun gettin to know the area (around salt lake city). then, last week i built in redding, ca, with the help of my superviser, and we had fun with the volunteers and playground installers... our site in redding was super rocky, and we had several technical/construction issues come up. it was really challenging, but i survived... our volunteers were great and, surprisingly, they didn't complain about anything (a bit rare in this job). overall, it was a good build, but i was super hard on myself about things. unfortunately, i sometimes let the littlest things get in the way of my well-being, and then i feel like i have no solid ground beneath me.

over the last couple of days, i've started to feel the earth again, but my heart is still unpleasantly distracting me. here's the thing: i'm officially on my own again, and i'm trying hard to recenter my inner love and embrace my independence. it's especially hard because he was so cool and i felt such a strong connection between us. oh well. i guess timing IS everything.